I was thinking of buying a pineapple while out shopping today. I’ve never cut a pineapple before so I had to search for articles on how to cut pineapples.
The instructions seem simple enough so I bought one. After the shopping and cutting up of the fruit, I deduced that cutting pineapple is not as easy as people make it to be. Here’s why:
Instructions: Pick a pineapple that is yellow with green leaves.
What they don’t tell you: The yellow pineapples are hidden under the green ones so you have to battle through their prickly leaves to get the one you desire.
Instructions: Cut the top and bottom of the pineapple away.
What they don’t tell you: The pineapple I got was pretty tough so I end up moving my chopping board to the floor. I had to kneel down so I could push my blade through. The bottom was oddly shaped so I had to cut a lot away.
Instructions: Slice a vertically down the “eye” to remove the row of eyes.
What they don’t tell you: The eyes of my pineapple were not straight at all. It looked like stars instead.
I had to manually remove the eyes away. My pineapple looked like the exterior of a Gaudi-designed apartment block at the end.
Instructions: Quarter the pineapple, remove the core and chop the rest to the size you like.
What they don’t tell you: The core is my second favorite part of the pineapple. I sliced it off but kept it so I can chew on it later.
Instructions: Chill and serve.
What they don’t tell you: If it’s too sour, sprinkle some salt on it.